Gear You Can Actually Afford | Uppgrader » Gear

Octopussy Floor Lamp

uppgrade — Wed, 15 Aug 2012 11:48:08 +0000

[TBA] Have you ever wanted a floor lamp that references James Bond AND scares the ever-loving piss out of you when you try to find the bathroom at 3 AM, because here it is! It’s the Octopussy Floor Lamp, and it’s beautiful and terrifying. Not sure what the production timeline is on this piece, but we do know it’s got one main lamp and three smaller LED tentacles. Cool incarnate.

Modular Shower Station

uppgrade — Wed, 15 Aug 2012 00:43:47 +0000

[$70] Not that we have the energy in the morning to sort out all the bells and whistles on a Modular Shower Station, but as far as shower accessories go, it still looks cool as shit. ~~Not that shit is cool. It’s more of a lukewarm. Not that we would know.~~ The Modular Shower Station has four separate shelves with specialized holders for your shampoo, shaving razor, soap, sponges, etc. It’s got everything you need to scrub off all of last night’s sin.

Bottle Lock

uppgrade — Mon, 13 Aug 2012 11:54:36 +0000

[$20] You paid a lot of money for that bottle of aged bourbon, and you’ll be damned if you’re going to let your swarthy little roommate guzzle it while you’re at work. Do yourself a favor and invest in peace of mind with a Bottle Lock – pretty much the only thing that will keep prying lips off your hooch without breaking the bottle. We literally have no idea how the Bottle Lock works – I mean, no idea what-so-ever. But it does work and that’s what matters.

RC Armored Drink Carrier

uppgrade — Fri, 10 Aug 2012 16:09:02 +0000

[$100] They call is the Armored RC Drink Carrier, but we’re going to call it the prank drink carrier from hell. Yeah sure, it can bring you a drink. It can also spray you in the face with pool water at the hands of one of your a-hole friends. Oh, and when it’s not carrying drinks, the RC Drink Carrier’s wheels retract so it can cruise around a swimming pool with the sole purpose of spraying water at people. Awesome.

Sebastian Slim Wallet

uppgrade — Thu, 09 Aug 2012 14:54:01 +0000

[$60] No one wants a fat tumor of a wallet sticking out of their back pocket, so cut the bullshit and saddle up with a Sebastian Slim Wallet from Wheelmen & Co. Made with gorgeous Honey top grain leather and waxed canvas, good old Sebastian can fit six cards and a stack of cash for your shopping pleasure.

iPhone Scuba Suit

uppgrade — Wed, 01 Aug 2012 12:26:40 +0000

[$60] If we’re being honest, your entire life is probably on your iPhone, so do you really want to trust an underwater case with your precious everything? Yes, yes you do, as long as it’s the iPhone Scuba Suit. The Scuba Suit lets you take pictures at depths up to 15 feet with no fear of screwing your phone to hell. It’s Gel screen allows you to manipulate the screen with no problems, so technically you can play NBA Jams on your iPhone in the middle of the Atlantic if you want. Think of the activities!

Gold Medal Bottle Opener

uppgrade — Wed, 25 Jul 2012 13:40:54 +0000

[$10] You’re not an Olympic athlete, but pop a few beers with this Gold Medal Bottle Opener and you’ll be doing backflips off your couch during women’s gymnastics. Alright so it’s not really gold, but it’ll open beers from now until the Winter Olympics.

Glass Toaster

uppgrade — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 12:19:04 +0000

[TBA] We’re submitting this Glass Toaster for the genius idea of the year award… if there is such a thing, which there is not. Buy this, never burn toast again, simple as that. Unfortunately it’s not in production yet, but give it some internet love and that story could change.

Glowdoggie Collars

uppgrade — Mon, 09 Jul 2012 12:27:31 +0000

[$50] Originally used for keeping track of German rescue dogs on night missions, Glowdoggie Collars are perfect for the discerning dog owner who wants to get his pooch into the rave scene. These collars are 100% waterproof LED collars, perfect for night hikes with man’s best friend, or a rousing game of catch with a glow-in-the-dark Frisbee.

Drink Chiller Coaster

uppgrade — Mon, 09 Jul 2012 11:28:29 +0000

[$42] In this ridiculous summer heat, whiskey stones and ice may not be enough to keep your hooch cold, but we’re willing to bet if you throw in a Drink Chiller Coaster you’ll be sipping pretty all day. The Drink Chiller is a pretty simple concept: it’s just a deep coaster, kind of like a koozie and a coaster combined. Loose enough to easily slide your tumbler in and of at will, and stylish enough to present to company.

Office Bowling

uppgrade — Tue, 03 Jul 2012 04:20:20 +0000

[$30] Bored at the office but the boss is hovering around? Check out this clever Office Bowling set, made with laser-cut cardboard pieces. Throw ten frames with your cube mates without management ever knowing. Minor assembly required.

No. 212 Moleskine Cover

uppgrade — Mon, 02 Jul 2012 13:10:33 +0000

[$75] Is $75 too much to ask for a Moleskine cover? Well, depends on what you put in your notebook. But if it’s worth protecting against rain, errant drink spills and pen explosions – and you happen to enjoy the feel of first class leather – then the No. 212 is for you.

Want: 2013 Subaru BRZ

uppgrade — Fri, 29 Jun 2012 12:53:40 +0000

[$25K+] We’ve never posted a car on Uppgrader, but we really like this one. The Subaru BRZ is a fun little driver’s car that doesn’t lay waste to your checking account. The BRZ only has 200 bhp, but with a rev happy engine and superb handling and chassis, the BRZ can match the performance of much more powerful rides. Check the video below for proof.

Alpine Rucksack

uppgrade — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 12:09:40 +0000

[$400] In the mood to buy a really expensive backpack? Yeah, neither are we. But if we were, this Seil Marschall Alpine Rucksack would be our pick. Made with vegetable tanned leather, French-made canvas (apparently the French are great with canvas), leather straps and copper rivets. Holds a day’s worth of hiking gear.

Hyper Dog Ball Launcher

uppgrade — Wed, 27 Jun 2012 12:05:59 +0000

[$20] Doesn’t matter how hyper your hound is, a couple shots from the Hyper Dog Ball Launcher and your pooch is pooped. A 220 foot range tends to have that effect. At first we figured the Hyper Dog was just for lazy people who don’t want to throw a ball, but with its epic range this slingshot is clearly designed to wreak havoc on your pet’s endurance. Also great for backyard fights.